Before I Was Ravenous
by TravelingThroughTime
Summary: As John Boyd encounters life on the Oregon Trail along with it's hardships and challenges, he writes to his family back east of the things that take place and the people he meets...takes place before the movie Ravenous.
1. Letters Part 1

The historic letters of John Boyd and his experiences with everyday life during the U.S. Mexican War and traveling the Oregon Trail.

**BEFORE I WAS RAVENOUS**

LETTERS PART I

* * *

September 17th 1846

Dear Pa,

The pipe I smoke it burns my throat, but it's somehow a feeling I like.

I see these people gathered about their camp fires, sharing their small rations and serving soup from the dutch ovens.

I sit near my tent on an old worn log, my horse tied to a small tree.

We've been traveling through these prairie grass lands for nine weeks now. I, along with some other men, met up with this wagon train and volunteered to guide it through Donor's Pass. They came through the Fort Wataka where I was stationed.

Ever since I joined the army, my life's been harder it seems. And I miss home and the familiar faces of family something awful.

The thing that worry's me most is the war with Mexico…I fear it's looking grim for our soldiers. And there's something inside me that makes me fear the battle; the battle I know I'll face again eventually…But don't tell mother, I shan't have her worrying over me.

The days are comfortably warm with small breezes here and there, but the nights are growing colder. I can feel winter nearing.

The prairie grass isn't much to look at itself; but the mountains are quite a sight and at night you can see millions of stars…it reminds me of how you and I would sit out on the porch after dinner; just talking man to man and looking at the stars all the while.

Speaking of dinner, I sure miss Mother's cooking right about now. The military keeps you full on good days, but sometimes you have to eat stuff you can't bare. I've never been one for meat.

The good news is that I've been promoted to Lieutenant. I rather like being called Lieutenant Boyd.

I reckon I'll close for now. Give Mother all my love and tell little Beth I'll be sending her a real genuine military bullet. It's from my own gun.

Take care of yourself Pa.

- John

* * *

September 30th, 1846

Dear family,

This morning we went buffalo hunting on the range. Food has been getting scarce and the soldiers and settlers spend most of their time fishing now by the river, picking vegetation and eating some of the livestock.

On our hunt we made distant contact with some strangers on horseback.

We eventually realized that these strangers were Indians, so we decided to give up the hunt and head back to the wagon train…it's best we don't muscle in on their buffalo if they're hostiles.

I pray these Indians will pose no threat to us. We hope to move on westward in the morning.

With all my love,

- John

* * *

October 1st, 1846

Dear Pa,

I write today once more of a terrible event that happened late last night after our Indian encounter.

When everyone was settled, there was a faint sound over Joseph's harmonica…we all thought it coyotes at first, but when the arrows started flying and the sound of hoofs began to trample around us, we knew it to be our Indians.

It was hard to see them in the dark, even with the lanterns and torches.

The women and children crouched inside the wagon's circle while me and the rest of the men folk took the savages on as best we could with our rifles.

Five of my men were wounded and two settlers were shot dead. Unfortunately one of the settlers was the only doctor with us.

We managed to rid ourselves of these savages; luckily there was only a small group of them, and we're moving on in an hour's time. The settlers are burying the body as of right now. I do feel sympathy for his family.

There are no plans for going after the savages, it's too risky and we haven't the time.

I'll keep you posted as best I can.

Take care,

-John

* * *

October 10th, 1846

Dear family,

We crossed a small river today. One of the heavy Conestoga's got caught in some mud so me and my men had to help pull it out with our horses and some spare ox. Thankfully nothing was lost.

You all may be surprised by your John, but there's a young lady here who I've been talking to a little more everyday.

Her name is Jenny Livingston and she's actually the daughter of the doctor who was murdered by Indians.

I know you'll be particularly proud of me mother. I'm not saying anything is to become of us, but she's a fine young girl and very smart too.

She's tall and slender and she has long red locks that she sometimes allows to hang down. And her Irish accent is her best charm I think…besides the gleam I see in her eyes. It's been hard on her with losing her pa, but she's a strong willed girl.

It's a bit embarrassing, but yesterday I saw her wearing a calico dress with her hair streaming down, and when she smiled at me I thought she was the prettiest little thing a man could ever see.

I'll be having lunch with her and her ma on our next stop. Maybe I'll get to knowing her better.

It's amazing the people you'll meet on a wagon train, and from so many cultures too.

Love,

-John

* * *

October 15th , 1846

Dear family,

I have some grim news today.

I fear that Jenny has come down with a terrible ailment. We're not quite sure yet, but her ma suspects scarlet fever. Yes, scarlet fever…it sickens me to think of losing her now. Jenny and I have been growing very close.

I've told her all about you all. She is very interested in you, Beth. I do pray you'll both get to meet.

Lord knows if she gets sicker, I'll be at a loss. What am I to do? I just don't know. I'm no doctor. We haven't much medicine…I just want her to be well. I pray we won't have to burry her as we did her pa, God rest his soul.

I'll keep you posted on Jenny…I pray that by the time you receive these letters, she'll be good as new again.

With love,

-John

* * *

Author's Notes: _I hope everyone enjoys this. I'll add more along and along. I got inspired to do this after I read a re-print of some actual pioneer letters. I absolutely love history like that and am truely a Ravenous fan. If you haven't seen Ravenous, I suggest you do unless you don't like gore. It's a great movie with a twisted yet incridibly interesting plot. The only thng I hated was the way it ended._

**To Ravenous Fans: **_Please keep in mind that this is before the movie, before John was really messed up by the war...I kind of want to pick up on who he is as a person and get a little deeper into that character...We all know that he tended to be timid and ensecure of himself so I'll try and keep him in character as best I can._


	2. Letters Part 2

**BEFORE I WAS RAVENOUS**

LETTERS PART 2

* * *

October 27th 1846

Dear family,

I've been beside myself.

It's took me some time just to muster the desire to even write, judging by the deep state of depression I've fallen in since the seventeenth of this month, because that was the day that Jenny Livingston died of scarlet fever.

We tried everything, gave her medicine, kept her warm, but scarlet fever is a difficult thing to treat; especially in the wilderness.

My heart was broken by her passing.

She told me, before her final day, to give her locket to you, Beth. I don't know why, but it seemed important to her and she made me promise.

The locket is laying beside me on my saddle bag as I write. It's a shiny piece of gold. I must say it was mighty generous of her. I know it'll look smart on you, little sister, just as it did on Jenny.

In my prayers, I always speak Jenny's name, hoping that she's found her peace with her pa. And I pray the same for her ma.

Yes, besides Jenny's death, another disaster took place that same day.

Her mother seemed to want some time alone for her grieving. There were no tears in her blue eyes, but I could still see the pain of her shock.

When some of the women folk wandered down to the river to wash some of the tin plates and cups, they came running back not long afterward; screaming and crying all at once.

When we finally calmed the women down, they managed to tell us that they had found Maggie Livingston's body floating face flat in the river bank.

And it was so.

The men folk and I wasted no time on the investigation; and when we arrived, we found her just like the women said; face flat in the water of the bank. It didn't take us long at all to find the body, and it was a horrible thing to witness.

I think that all of us bared a broken heart that day, for both Jenny and her mother.

Mrs. Livingston just couldn't bear the loss of her daughter, and I know the pain she must have been going through…they were both fine women.

Until I write again,

Love always,

-John

* * *

November 4th, 1846

Dear family,

More grim news. One of the young girls has gone missing from the wagon train.

My men and I spoke with the parents, and they gave us a description; brown hair, freckles and fifteen years old. Her name is Molly Sage.

We searched all day, but found nothing but a red ribbon. The parents identified it as hers and we plan to continue the search tomorrow.

This will indeed hold up our journey, but we can't leave a child behind. I just pray she's alright. I couldn't bear the thought of anything becoming of Beth in this manner.

Love,

-John

* * *

November 6th, 1846

Forgive me for writing again of grievous accounts. My heart is going out to the Sage family right now.

The little girl's body was found somewhere in the woods by my men.

They brought her back to the encampment of our wagon train, and I was the first to look over her.

Her body was battered and covered in blood and she had been stripped of all her clothing. One of the men said she must have been raped by Indians and I literally relieved myself of the sickness that plagued me of this dilemma right then and there. But my vomit was no where as sickening to me as the sight of an innocent child being harmed.

I will not even go into the details of her parents' reaction, or the reaction of the other settlers. All I can say is that many of them are beginning to think our wagon train is cursed.

Take care,

-John

* * *

Author's Notes: _So what do you guys think so far? Sorry for the lack of updates; I'll try to post more frequently with this story._


	3. Letters Part 3

**BEFORE I WAS RAVENOUS**

LETTERS PART 3

* * *

November 10th 1846

Dear family,

The last three days have been harsh and the wagon train has been unable to continue. The reason is due to a harsh blizzard that came through this way on the 8th .

It hit like a hailstorm, literally out of nowhere.

As I write, my fingers feel numb, and my teeth seem to cling against each other like marbles.

My face is covered with white flickers of the icy drops and I'm huddled inside of an almost pointless wool blanket that gives my bones little to no warmth in this hole bearing rag.

Most of the settlers have found shelter within their covered wagons.

We lost four of our good tents along the trail while crossing another river, and the only two we have now are being shared between nine of my men.

The wind whips one's skin like that of a pop whip, and there's a few settlers beside me struggling to keep a fire kindling for the sake of their coffee and chilled hands.

In this sudden harshness of nature, I only fear for the worse. I don't see how we'll manage in this climate.

Food is getting scarcer amongst our train, and hunting and vegetation gathering would be an endless struggle to success at this point.

We're forty three miles from reaching Fort Yukon, and if God willing, we'll get there somehow. It may be on a wing and a prayer, but if we can make it to the fort, there may be hope for our party yet.

I'll write again soon,

-Your John.


	4. Letters Part 4

**BEFORE I WAS RAVENOUS**

LETTERS PART 4

* * *

December 7th, 1846

Dear Family,

God's blessings have carried us through. We have been stationed at Fort Yukon for three days now, retaining the much needed rest and nourishment that we needed. As I sit on the wooden planks outside the Colonel's office, I watch a few of the settler children frolicking about with their hound.

The soldiers have been very generous to our train. Even Emmet, one of the farmers who's yoke was lost, has been given a new one from the stable keeper.

Everything is peaceful now, and we'll be staying put till winter calms. But our coming here was the utmost difficult of tasks. At times, I doubted any of us would make the forty miles that led us here.

Another blizzard came and went before our arrival at Fort Yukon; and in the snow we were blind but desperate. Against my counseling, the settlers were determined to carry on in the snow, anxious to find the Fort where they could feed the starving children. But the snow was so deep until they were forced to stay put, despite their efforts and rebellions.

We shivered in the snow, the soldiers and I. The settlers bunked up in their empty wagons. All their belongings, save the blankets and quilts, were put out for the making of extra room in the Conestogas.

There were times when I thought, that if I didn't do so myself, one of my men would surely freeze over to death and I couldn't bear losing any of them.

When the snow storm passed us by in it's forgiveness, we were relieved, but it was a struggle to pull the wagons and the animals out of their snow pits in which they were buried. And to add to our little list of dilemmas, we found that one of the elders and two young children had been stricken with fever.

We weren't delayed by the ill-fated news, and we moved on. Staying behind and trying to tend illness with unskilled hands would be futile and there was better hope in reaching Fort Yukon for doctoring.

We trailed on for four days until we reached the woods. There we rested and luck returned to our side in small quantity with the gathering of timber for the fires and the killing of a stag. Our meager meal of deer meat was accepted by all of us with gratitude, and one of the mothers brewed some deer stew over the fire for the sick ones.

That night we caught no sleep. Wolves crowded round us in the foothills of the woods, smelling the carcass remains of the stag, though we carried it far off, and growing curious of our camp. I held my rifle close, keeping my eyes open, tired as they were, and listening out for wolf-mischief.

The next day came not a moment too soon, but in a manner we would not welcome. We discovered, from news of Emmet, that his wife, the mother of the ill little ones, had caught fever as well and that the children and the elderly lady were only getting sicker.

We settled her into the comfort of the wagon along with the other sick ones, and we started back on the trail not a moment too soon. We didn't take the time to settle out what few rations of food we had. We figured we'd eat on the way.

Ten days came, another child fell ill and I was coming to worry that our train would not last another week with the ill tidings of fever it brought us. The following day, Emmet had made some soup for the sick, and when he brought it to them he came blundering out of the wagon screaming; "Miss Lucy's dead! Miss Lucy's dead!"

We gave the old woman as best a funeral as we could; and afterwards we moved on with heavy hearts. We knew the possibilities at hand and I could only imagine the fear that Emmet felt for his sick-ridden family.

In the days that followed Miss Lucy's death, my soldiers and I and the other strong bodied settlers hunted like scavengers, returning only with small foul or vermin if anything at all. The food just wasn't enough to sustain us all.

We were getting weary along the trail. Five days passed us again and we were moving slow. Everyone was getting ravenous and it made me uneasy.

"What about the cow? We don't need her!" shouted one of the hungry men.

"We need her milk!" Protested a woman who cradled a baby in her arms.

The old Jersey was all we had left of the livestock and I wasn't about to let the horses or oxen fall victim to hungry humans. They were all we had to pull the wagons through the snow.

Despite the whimpering woman with the baby, the men butchered the poor cow and roasted her remains on the flame.

I strayed off into the woods during the event, keeping my horse close at my side. I couldn't bear the sight of blood that was yet to come. The blood made me ill in my mind as did the cow's cries.

Night came and went and I watched the stars till they disappeared. As I readied myself for the new day, I caught sight of a small number of horsemen headed our way from the dale. With the gathering of my men, we rode out to meet them and to our relief, they came from Fort Yukon.

The soldiers followed us back to the wagon encampment, and helped ready the settlers. It was a three day's journey but we made there in time.

The children and Emmet's wife are still under the doctor's watch and from what I understand, are doing well despite their raspy coughs.

Last night the Colonel told me that he'd like to meet with me in his office tonight. He said he had news concerning the war against Mexico that he wanted to share with me. I'll be going to speak with him in about an hour.

I'll close for now.

- Your John.


End file.
